God wants us to honour our parents and this is very clear from the bible. In fact the bible didn’t mince words on this issue.
Ephesians 6: 1- 3
Children obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. “Honour your father and mother,” which is the first commandment with promise: “that it may be well with you and you may live long on the earth”
This was Paul writing to the Christians at Ephesus. What he wrote here is a reaffirmation of the command of the Lord to the Israelites in the 10 commandment as seen in Ex 20: 12
In order to obey this bible instruction we need to adopt practical ways to honour our parents.
1. Respect your parents. Your parents deserve your respect irrespective of who they are. Even if other people despise them you should always and constantly show them respect. Your parents may be educated or illiterates, they may be rich or poor. These make no difference. You are not to respect your parents because of their economic ability or their level of education. You should respect and honour them simply because they are your parents.
2. Obey your parents within the parameter of godliness. Obeying your parent is top on the list of practical ways to honour your parents. If you don’t obey them when you should I wonder how else you intend to honour them. In our early lives, obedience is the paramount way of honouring our parents. If you obey them you honour them and if you disobey them you dishonour them. It is as simple as we have said it.
Ephesians 6: 1- 3
Children obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right.
The only exception to this is when your parents want you to do things that are against the word of God. Even at this you should not dishonour them. You simply let them know that what they want you to do is wrong and unacceptable before God. You should express this in a simple respectable manner. For instance, if your parents want you to steal, will you do? Will you go ahead and steal? You certainly must not do that. However you must be respectful in letting them know what they demand of you is wrong and that you won’t be able to carry it out.
3. Listen to them. I have seen people who don’t in anyway listen to their parents. There are even some that the voice of their parents is like an irritating sound to them. You should not pick up this kind of dishonouring attitude to your parents. Simply listening when they talk to you signifies honour. Learn to do this if you have not.
4. Don’t argue with them. There will be times that you will have different views from your parents on issues. This just shows that you are thinking differently. Make your view known to them as simple and as respectful as possible. Don’t drag them into an argument because they are not getting your points. You should just find a way to make them see what you want them to see. If they are still not seeing your point then you should drop the issue. It is better to drop the issue than to allow it spoil your relationship with you parents.
5. You should not be rude to them irrespective of what they might do or fail to do. Be careful not to look them in the eye. They are your parents and they deserve your respect all the same.
6. Speak to them in a honourable manner. You shouldn’t speak to them as you would to a colleague or someone younger than you. Let your words to them always be adorned with honour.
7. Greet them appropriately as required by your culture. You shouldn’t try to copy western practice to ignore the honourable way that your culture expects you to greet your parents. The bible is not against our cultural values as long as they don’t contradict the word of God.
8. Don’t speak ill of them. This is something that is very important. Don’t talk negatively about your parents to people. If you parents have done something that is not good enough you should just find an honourable way to point their attention to it. Don’t speak ill of them.
9. Don’t look down on them. They may have weaknesses that are known to you. This does not give you the right to dishonour them.
10. You shouldn’t do anything that can cause them shame. Strive to bring honour to them through your achievement, pursuit and what you stand for.
11. Don’t do anything that will contradict the values they hold e. g getting into sexual activities before marriage, getting pregnant outside wedlock, stealing and other similar things.
12. Appeal to them if they get displeased with you. You shouldn’t just ignore them.
13. Always ask after their well being. Don’t just ask for money if you are a student. Parents are happy when their children care enough to ask after their well being.
14. Run errands for them. It makes them feel happy.
15. Spend time talking or interacting with them. It is the joy of every parent to see their children come into fellowship with them.
16. Defend and stand for them as necessary at any time. You should not be indifferent to people who wants to dishonour or take advantage of your parents.
17. Affirm your love for them at every available opportunity. Let them know you love them and you care about them.
18. Respect their privacy. As much as you should be free with your parents you should also learn to respect their private moments. Many people overlook this.
19. Deliberately speak well of them to people in their presence and when they are not there.
20. Celebrate them. Find ways to make their special days really special to them. Plan a surprise birthday celebration for them. Have your friend call them on their birthdays to wish them a blissful day. Mark their wedding anniversaries in unique manners. Do something special just to celebrate them.
QUESTION
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